Hi, it has been a week since I got my medical abortion done and I just wanted to share the ups and downs that I went through — hoping to inspire courage and prevent others from doing the same mistake that I did (trying pills from local online seller). This will somehow be a long read so please bear with me.
To provide a better understanding of it, here is the timeline of my journey:
April 26 2024: first day of last period
May 2: first unprotected sex after period
May 10: intercourse that I think resulted to pregnancy
May 28: tested positive in pt, I immediately panicked and rushed things to end the pregnancy. Desperate, I only searched through social media platforms for sources of abortion pills.
On Reddit, a lot of girls mentioned about ” Fredli’s Group of Doctors” and I researched more and read a lot about them. Some of them good, some of them not so good. I initially contacted them thinking those bad reviews are just fabricated by their competitors but later on decided against it kasi the queu can take so long daw. I want to get it over with the soonest.
I planned to take the meds in the dormitory to keep it a secret from my family, although my roommate knows about it.
May 30: (1st attempt) The pills from an online seller in facebook was delivered sa dorm, 6misoprostol and 6mifepristone (probably fake). She provided me with two options, either to take it orally or vaginally. She recommended the insert method since it is most effective daw but I find it difficult kasi I have to do a 7-day preparation pa. In the prep, you have to take evening primrose oil (drink 1 in the morning and insert 1 in the evening), do steaming of the vagina for 15mins before inserting primrose at night, drink ginger juice, etc. The prep for 7 days is too matrabaho for me and I didn’t want to follow it kasi I don’t think it is proven to add in the success rate of abortions. Thus, I decided for the oral method which she just sent me an instructional poster from Safe2choose . In the same day, I took all 6mife.
May 31: After 12 hours of mife, I took 3miso under my tongue. After 3 hours, I took the other 3 miso sublingually as well. I had blood clots for about 2 days then it stopped. During the process, I was sending pictures of discharges to the seller. She concluded the pills did not work and would be best if I test after 2 weeks to check for positive in the pregnancy test.
June 14: still tested positive in pt but maybe baka sa remaining pregnancy hormones lang kaya nagfalse positive.
June 19: had an ultrasound since seller suggested it to confirm things and turns out I have an ongoing pregnancy. I was 6w3d at the time of ultrasound. The ob-gyne was worried because the embryo still doesn’t have a heartbeat at 6weeks age. She gave me progesterone to insert in the vagina for 7days to help in the fetal development (which ofcourse I didn’t do). Also, asked me to come back on June26 to check if there’s cardiac activity na which would meant the pregnancy is viable (didn’t come back since I was scared to know if there’s a heartbeat na ba).
June 20: got 8miso from someone on Reddit na hindi nila nagamit kasi turns out ectopic pregnancy pala yung kaniya. I figured I was still lacking the enough amount of pills so I ordered from Women on Web . They require a donation before processing shipment. Donation can only be made through credit card or bank transfer. Cc is my only option but still hesistant to do the transaction since my mom will be notified if I charged something on it.
June 21: decided to just use my credit card basta and lied to my mom about it saying na it was a book from something like Wisdom on Women hahaha
June 23: found out about Project486 mentioned by someone on Reddit. I emailed them agad kasi the pills from WoW can take 2 to 3 weeks pa to arrive and it felt too long na wala akong ginagawa about this. They replied immediately and I got in contact na with Dr. JJ sa WhatsApp. He proceeded with the consultation and technicalities of the procedure. I was inclined to trust them agad kasi the way he speaks seems like he really is knowledgeable and a medical professional. Sila lang rin yung nagtanong sakin about my medical history, allergies, pregnancies of other females in the family, and other in-depth questions for them to gauge the type of patient I am and whether I would have serious complications or not.
June 28: I got the pills na from Project 486, was supposed to start on the same day but I ended up telling my parents about it na. I was so worried kasi what if these are my last days na since one of the girls (not a client of Project 486) I’m talking to sa Reddit is nahospital and said she almost died (they had to do blood transfusion and D&C after she had heavy bleeding for a few days and clots na kasize ng buong kamay niya). I was overthinking na baka umabot din ako sa ganon point kaya I needed all the strength that I can get from my circle (plus the reassurance that I am getting genuine pills, apparently the reddit girl who bled heavily had only taken Misoprostol , her Mifepristone pills were probably fake.)
My friends and I, we placed too much confidence in my parents na susuportahan nila ako on my 2nd attempt. Especially my mom, kasi she knows na I was on birth control pills before. But turns out, they wanted me to keep the pregnancy. Aminado naman sila na they still have this traditional mindset na it is not morally right to abort. They already made plans for me na hindi na ako mageenroll next sem, that’s when I knew na they’re really serious on keeping it kahit ayoko.
June 29: sent a heads up to Dr. JJ na I’ll postpone yung pagtake ng pills.
I was so down after the talk with my parents, felt like my right to choose was taken away from me in an instant. Although I knew that there will be much worse conflict between my parents and I if i still pursued the 2nd attempt, but I stand firm on my decision to end it pagkabalik ko ng dorm. I was feeling panicky and anxious for days dahil dito, it’s as if I can’t live my life until I get this done.
June 30: found the courage to tell my brothers about it na rin and I was so relieved kasi they’re pro-choice. Para sa isang kuya ko, nagkamali na nga daw ako pero hindi tama na habang-buhay pa akong ‘paparusahan’ to keep the baby against my will. They helped convince my parents about it, I think yung nakapagpabago ng isip nila is the fact na there could be fetal malformation or birth defects since I did my 1st attempt na nga. My parents ended up supporting me na rin in my decision kasi instead of 9months excitement, they felt na it could be months of worry if okay ba yung baby paglabas niya.
July 1: (2nd attempt Day1) Got back sa dorm since I still have my classes. But mom wanted me to go home for Day3 since mas mapapanatag daw siya kung nasa bahay ako while on miso procedure. I informed Dr. JJ na I will start my Day1 today and I started to have light bleeding without taking any meds pa, which made me think na baka I’m bound to have a miscarriage talaga. Did not feel any side effects after taking the first mife.
July 2: (Day2) Still strictly following the schedule of fasting and light meals. Took the second mife and could still go on with my daily routine.
July 3: (Day3) After my morning class, bumiyahe na ako pauwi and started my Day3. My mom cancelled her appointments for the day and the day after para daw she can look after me (so thankful for her). I was just on my room for the procedure and also constantly been sending updates sa family gc namin haha. Also, didn’t really felt any disturbing pain kahit I didn’t took any ibuprofen or pain relievers, which made me think na baka hindi na talaga viable (di na nagkaron ng heartbeat) kaya it was easy for me to expel things out.
Around 12:30am, blood clots came out as soon as I stood up after hours of lying down. Sent pictures of it to Dr. JJ. I was legit dissecting the clots and discharges, especially the yolk sac that came out. My other brother has been very helpful kasi sakanya ako nagsasabi ng mga kailangan ko para dalhin niya sa cr like toothpick, plastic, and all that I need to poke things. After an hour of sending documentation and getting replies from Dr. JJ, they concluded that with a very high confidence level, that the procedure is successful since the major POC (products of conception) is out. He told me to keep observing things and just send pictures of discharges if there’s any in the coming days.
July 11: bleeding, blood clots, cramps completely stopped, although it significantly decreased na naman the day after taking miso pa lang which my mom assured me na those are good signs na I had a complete abortion. I also just finished the 7-day antibiotic after the procedure.
—–‐——————
We are planning to have an ultrasound and a general check-up to see if I’m really okay na ba and also para sa peace of mind na rin na wala na talagang remnants inside. This experience has truly taught me a lesson, sobrang mali na yung mga life choices ko lately. But one thing I did right is to tell my family and close friends about it. I’m very very grateful for the support system that I have and have been constantly checking on me. I don’t really know if tama ba pero I prayed pa kasi to allow me to terminate it, and in return I won’t even wish for a child of my own in the future. One of my friends told me to don’t be too harsh on myself but honestly, I really don’t think I’m deserving pa to be a mother if kaya ko nga gawin ‘to. Instead, I vow to help others going through this same experience na lang as part of my life goal.
To girls having unwanted pregnancies, don’t let anyone take your choice away from you. Do it with the right pills and procedure. Based on my experience, you can definitely trust Project486 to put your life back on track. Hoping things will be better for all of us soon! 🙂
This decision wasn’t easy at all. I believe every child deserves stability and love, and right now I know I can’t provide that yet. I reached out to Project 486 because they were transparent, patient, and didn’t judge me or pressure me. They made me feel heard when I really needed it.